Lately, I’ve been wondering why we, as parents, put so much emphasis on our children to not only play high school sports, but to join organized squads that don’t represent anything. What is the ultimate outcome we are hoping for? Is it that important a life lesson that our offspring learn how to hit an inside curve ball or shoot a floating jump-shot? Used to be, not so long ago, that the primary reasons to play sports were to learn how to work together, display sportsmanship and demonstrate accountability for your actions on and off the field. Today, that message has been lost and the biggest reason for it can be traced directly to the rise of travel sports teams. For the uninitiated, a travel team works like this: a group of parents get together, create a team specifically for their kids, and then travel (hence the name) around the country together entering tournaments with other travel teams. What’s the harm, you say? On the surface, none. For a lot of young people, it can prove to be a very positive experience; however, it seems to be getting out of hand. In many cases, it threatens to damage the very children parents hoped would benefit from playing sports; and it all begins with the shirts on their backs, or should I say, uniforms.
There was a time when a child wouldn’t expect to put on his first real uniform until at least junior high. That jersey would proudly display the name of the school and bear the stitched up marks of seasons past. When you wore it, you represented something. You instantly became a torch-bearer for your community and eagerly hoped to add your name to the pantheon of legends that came before you. Pictures of previous teams and their trophies lined the school hallways, reminding you of your place as just a temporary caretaker of this solemn duty. Once your brief stewardship was done, you handed off the responsibility to your younger siblings. As the years went by, you often returned to the same field as a proud alum for Homecoming. There would be an instant kinship with the rest of the spectators who displayed the school colors. They were your tribe, and they kept the traditions alive. Perhaps, as you often daydreamed, your own children would wear that same uniform someday as they played in the exact varsity gym you once did so many seasons ago.
Today – not so much.
Travel teams carry with them the inherent danger of feeding into the narcissistic trend that has become so prevalent in our society. It’s what causes someone to talk during a movie, text while driving, or park in handicapped spaces “for just a minute.” Many people now are unable to control their desire for immediate gratification because they are convinced that their need supersede those around them. This dangerously inflated sense of self-worth begins when a nine-year-old’s parents are flying him out to Las Vegas for a lacrosse game because there’s no team within six states “good enough” to play against. Most troubling, we now have instances where our top athletes don’t even play on their high school teams anymore because their travel team coaches tell them they can’t. They’ve been convinced its better to play summer AAU ball or club soccer, so they can be randomly grouped and paraded before college recruiters. This is the surest sign of things going too far. Many may respond by asking, “What difference does it make to you?” I’m concerned because of the difference it makes to the kid. For example, if a player wasn’t getting enough playing time on a high school team, they may be motivated to display a better attitude or work harder in the off-season. With travel teams, the parents would simply join, or even create, a new team. And that’s precisely the wrong response.
You see, the lessons we learn in our youth are those that carry us through a lifetime. Beginning to teach a Wall Street banker to put ethics above profits when he’s 37 just doesn’t work. This is especially true when one’s childhood memories consist of being the absolute center of a parent’s attention to the point where one has no idea what it means to let someone else share the limelight. It’s the combination of the mascot on the sidelines, past championship banners hanging from the rafters, generations of fans, and the school song blared out by a pep band that reinforces the true message of sports; no single player is more important than the team for you are temporary and the team is permanent. At least, that’s how it used to be.
How many children right now have closets stuffed full of uniforms and shelves lined with trophies for teams that only existed for one season? There will never be an alumni night for these fifth grade traveling soccer teams because, unlike a school team, they aren’t connected to or truly represent anything. Is it really teamwork when your teammates are total strangers and are only out to inflate their individual stats? If little Johnny doesn’t even know his teammate’s last name, how motivated will Johnny be to sacrifice his chance of scoring and personal glory to pass to a better positioned but anonymous teammate? My high school football squad consisted of people I knew before potty-training. We grew up together, slept over at each other’s houses, knew whose mother made the best cookies. As we played in dirt lots and backyards, without parents recording our every move on their cell phones, we dreamed of one day wearing our school’s colors, like our older brothers did, and triumphing against our rivals down the road. We learned to conduct ourselves responsibly because to do otherwise would reflect badly on our community. Winning was rewarded with justifiable pride and in defeat we learned how to deal with the bitter sting of letting down your friends, the fans in the bleachers, and your town.
In short, sports used to help teach kids what it meant to be a part of something bigger than themselves and to take pride in representing it. There’s a great truth in the adage, “The name on back of the jersey is not as important as the one on the front.” I’m not sure what the intended message young kids today are supposed to be learning from travel teams, but they are getting a message. As Gene Hackman said in Hoosiers, when speaking of the high school athletic experience, “You know, most people would kill… to be treated like a god, just for a few moments.” It’s when travel teams cause our children to expect to be treated like that for the rest of their lives that they truly lose their luster.
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