Parenting is filled with do’s and don’ts. Rights and wrongs. The expert opinions on the spectrum of everything from high-fructose corn syrup to co-sleeping have people constantly arguing and demanding their opinion is the right one.
But what about those of us in it, fighting in the trenches? To you, oh soldiers of that eternal war called “Parenting”, I salute you. Here are some of your fellow brothers-in-arms calling it as it is, the best way possible.
“Making my kids listen to my playlist while in the car is just one of my favorite forms of punishment I offer.” @sarcasticmommy4
I know when my child shouts “No! No sing!” at me, I know I’m doing something right.
“What’s it called when you’re anxious enough to be a Helicopter Mom, but really, really lazy? A Blimp Mom? Yeah, I’m that.” @HousewifeOfHell
I think we’ve all been there at one point or another. You care, and you worry, and you want to make sure they’re okay… but some days it’s just easier to float on by and let whatever happens, happen. That’s when “First Response Mom” is called.
“My diet consists of living with a 3 yo who never lets me eat.” @WorkingMom86
No joke, I lost 25lbs because of this. Well, this and chasing them while hunched over.
“A proper #dadbeast resists sickness even when the rest of the house is throwing up.” @daxshepard1
And if the universe is in any way just, we won’t contract a conglomeration of all the viruses at once just as everyone is getting over them.
“If you carry around a screaming baby the mall kiosk people leave you alone.” @TheCatWhisprer
(writes that down)
“My 9yo son thought that watching Netflix with the subtitles on would count as his 20 minutes per night of reading homework. He’s a genius.” @Cheeseboy22
As they say, work smarter, not harder!
“My best parenting advice is to be scared if you hear laughing. Or fighting. Or silence. Actually just go ahead and be scared all the time.” @Not_that_mom
This one is almost too true to be funny. Almost.
“If you build it, they will come just like if my kids touch it, it will be destroyed.” @OneFunnyMummy
My nickname for my son when he was a toddler was “Destroyer of Worlds”. I love him dearly even as I put everything not made of steel out of his reach.
“Me: I love you, buddy.
3yo: Your face smells like waffles.
Me: *updates LinkedIn profile*”
@PaigeKellerman
Reason enough to hire anyone.
Sources: Babble